Pedley's Ponderings

I often think I’m only good at putting a sentence together. Some weeks, even that’s suspect.

Nonetheless, I’m regularly forced to put effort into obligations other than writing and this newspaper. At home, I’m in charge of the yard. Mowing, tree trimming, weed control and other standard chores fall under my belt. These things don’t require much effort and my caveman brain can usually handle it.

Last week, though, it all came crashing down.

I sprayed for weeds earlier this summer to great effect. They died like they always die, and the yard looked fine. It seemed I had won the annual battle once more.

That confidence was slightly rattled in late June when the weeds returned, this time with thistles in tow. Unshaken, I filled my sprayer last week with a stronger mixture and bravely forged ahead. I sprayed each unwanted plant a little longer this time, too, just for good measure.

Initial results were positive. The weeds turned brown and shriveled within 24 hours, and yours truly was confident I had beaten them for good this time – never back down in the face of adversity.

That hubris quickly evaporated Sunday when I started noticing dead spots all across my front yard. On Monday there were more, and on Tuesday, well, you get it.

We now have the only polka-dotted yard in Hartley. Something tells me our neighbors won’t be joining us in the latest yard “trend.”

The herbicide I use isn’t supposed to kill grass, but obviously if you don’t follow directions you’re liable to face consequences. Stupid thinking usually yields stupid results.

Now I have even more yard work on my plate in the form of replanting grass. Recent rains have made everything green again, and the dead spots really stand out – my yard looks like a dye job gone bad. That’s what I get for trying, though. My wife has been quick to remind me that every other attempt we’ve made at growing grass has ended in failure, so my confidence levels aren’t exactly high.

I wouldn’t care if this happened in the back yard. The dog already did enough damage over the winter, as apparently she peed in only four spots from December through March. If we’re keeping score, she’s destroyed more square footage of grass than me.

Still, I’m annoyed – more with myself than anything. Sometimes you just can’t win for losing.

Let this be a reminder to follow directions, especially when dealing with highly engineered herbicides. If any of my dear readers have tips for growing grass in roughly 30 separate spots in one yard, I’m all ears – it’s obvious I have no clue what I’m doing.

Then again, that’s nothing new.

Nick Pedley is the news editor and ad manager of The Hartley Sentinel-The Everly/Royal News.