The Writer's Pen

It has been said that grand parenting is the reward for putting up with your children all those years. Some have said they wished they could have gone to grand parenting right away, and skipped raising their own children. I believe those statements both have merit.

Thinking back, I have a lot of memories of my grandparents. Part of the reason is that they lived nearby, and we saw them quite often. Our farm was located less than five miles away from my Hembd grandparents, and about 12 miles away from my Brockshus grandparents. We would often see each other during the week, and usually on Sundays and holidays too.

When I think of all those times together, mostly I remember our Sunday afternoon gatherings. We would alternate Sundays with the grandparents, and sometimes one or both sets of grandparents would come to our house. I don’t know who was in charge of the scheduling, but everyone seemed to know and respect each other, so it seemed to work out.

When I was a boy, we attended church in Ocheyedan with my Hembd grandparents. I remember my grandparents coming to our house for Sunday dinner where we all tasted pizza for the first time. My mom bought a mix somewhere and served it with peas and potatoes on the side. I don’t think my grandpa liked it much, because he made a comment saying that he thought it was just a fad that would never catch on.

Sundays with my Brockshus grandparents had some predictable events. One of those events was my grandpa passing out wine glasses from a tray for everyone over the age of 13. When the tray was empty, he went back to the kitchen for pop or juice for the grandkids. When the grandkids would run off to play, the adults would visit and look at scrapbooks. My grandma would slip away to prepare lunch for everyone, and though there was plenty of other food, she always served vanilla ice cream with strawberries and raspberries. When we were ready to leave, we all lined up by the front porch to get our picture taken (for the scrapbook).

My Grandma Hembd was in bad health all of the years I knew her. I remember my siblings and cousins playing in her yard as she watched from the window. She was in bed the last years of her life battling leukemia. Her body was frail and she suffered greatly, but her mind was sharp and her manner was loving. My favorite memory of her was when she praised me for making one point in a basketball game. It was a JV game that meant nothing, but the scoring was in the local paper. You would have thought I had beaten the other team all by myself! She died not long after that, and even though I missed her greatly, I couldn’t cry for her since I knew she wasn’t hurting anymore.

I know my kids have lots of memories of their grandparents. We lived about 25 miles from them both, so we got together fairly often. My parents lived on a farm and loved to show our kids all the animals, take them fishing, and teach them card games. My in-laws, Merle and Jeannette Noble, attended our kids’ activities, filled them with ice cream, and took them to garage sales. My wife, Rita, and I often wondered who these people were. They weren’t like that when we were kids!

Time spent with our grandkids is less frequent because of the distance we live apart. I always tell people that all of our kids live on Interstate 29 – Sioux Falls, Omaha, and Kansas City – but it would be a long day if we tried to see them all on the same trip. Our most recent trip was to Kansas City to watch our granddaughters play eighth grade basketball. We drove through a snowstorm when we got into Missouri, and when we arrived were informed that one of their games had been cancelled. We were able to watch them play one game, but it is often challenging to visit the grandkids during the winter months.

Our daughter, Melanie, lives in Omaha and has been fighting cancer for several months. We have spent time with her and her sons when time and weather allows, and we try to enjoy some kind of adventure with them. We have gone to the zoo several times, and since the boys will be tired after two hours, we let them choose the areas to see ahead of time. They are quite the guides!

We raised our kids in Spirit Lake and they still have friends here. Even though we don’t live on the lake or have a boat, our kids and grandkids like to visit in the summertime. We live on a bike trail, have kayaks,and are not far away from the Arnolds Park Amusement Park, which we frequent at least one big day every summer. Also, we host a cookout on the Fourth of July at our house, inviting friends and relatives. Despite Rita dubbing me “Grumpy Grandpa,” I hope my grandkids will remember these good times, and think as fondly of me as I did of my grandparents.

Roger Brockshus and his wife, Rita, are mostly retired and live in Spirit Lake. They have a variety of interests, and try to keep in touch with their kids and grandkids. Roger is a member of the Hartley Writer’s and Poetry Group.